Remember the time when we used to cherish the phrase “happily ever after” so much that none of us could wait to get married and start the beginning of forever. Well, that isn’t the case anymore, is it? In the last few years, people have seen a rise in the ratio of separations and divorces globally. People that used vow themselves to each other for the rest of their lives now go their separate ways within the blink of an eye.
There are many reasons behind a failed marriage. Nobody quits on their marriage just because of a single mistake. But what are those reasons? Are you in the middle of a marriage crisis, or have you ever thought about why relationships go sour? We are enlisting down the top 10 reasons why marriages fail to give you some insight into divorces and separations.
10. Long-distance Relationship
Not everyone can survive a long-distance relationship. Being apart from your significant other and trying to remain to be close is another common cause for divorces. Several misunderstandings, frustration, suspicion, and lack of trust can stem from a lack of physical proximity that creates tensions and unwanted fights between two people.
In a long-distance relationship, spouses may come up with the most reasons of why the other person isn’t picking up the phone or video chatting. When you’re away from one another, the mind can come up with reasons to believe their partner is doing something they shouldn’t be. Some military spouses see this as an issue, and long-distance marriages are hard to endure.
9. Insecurity and Jealousy
Even though most of the people aren’t going to accept it, but jealousy isn’t a sign of love. Instead, it is the cause of a failed marriage.
Insecurity and jealousy destroy the root of marriage and eventually lead to divorce. If you’re insecure about your partner spending time out with his friends or if he is jealous of you spending time with your friends late out the night, this will cause frustration and resentment in the long run.
If you look at all the healthy marriages around you, you will see there isn’t room for jealousy between them.
8. Financial Crisis
Another reason why marriages fail is because of the economic crisis. In most of the Asian households, earning the bread and butter is usually the sole responsibility of the man of the house.
When there are so many kids at home, parents, and siblings, and only one earning hand, things are bound to get tough.
And not just that, the financial incompatibility, where one person earns more than the other, also inhabits power strain on their relationship. Most of the couples had reported in the US that when their significant other started making more than them, they felt a struggle of power and inferiority complex.
This reason can also be a straw to why marriages fail.
7. Unrealistic Expectations
Due to our social media and the growing internet age, we see people with private jets and resorting to 5-star restaurants in hopes that after marriage, we will get to do the same. But what we forget is that not everyone’s circumstances and goals are the same.
Having unrealistic expectations from your spouse and then setting them up for failure is another common cause of divorce.
One needs to be realistic in his approach towards life and not set standards that the other person cannot fulfill. These unrealistic standards aren’t just set by women but men as well, which is why marriages become doomed.
6. Lack of Communication
When two people, bound by a paper, do not communicate their hearts to each other, then there will be absolute distances between them.
Communication is essential in marriage, and when someone isn’t able to communicate his points to the other person clearly, there will be resentment and frustration in the relationship.
The lack of communication not only impacts the understanding but all aspects of marriage. Most of the healthy marriages have only gotten that way because there is secure communication between both the partners.
Making snide comments on each other, yelling, and not understanding one’s point of view are the unhealthiest ways of communication that.
Poor communication is another common cause of failed marriages.
5. No Intimacy
Another one of the most common causes is the lack of intimacy between partners. If you don’t feel connected to your partner, you will quickly feel that you’re either living with a stranger or a roommate.
The lack of intimacy will cause a void of emotional and physical intimacy, making the other person turn to someone else instead. Having intimacy between relationships isn’t always about sex. It’s more about feeling connected to your partner and giving time.
If you continuously give the cold shoulder to your spouse, then be aware that it would most likely become a reason for separation.
4. The Foundation of Marriage Is Wrong
Marrying someone for money, insurance, pregnancy, green cards, and other non-love reasons, can be why marriages are bound to fail. A marriage that lacks love is not strong enough to overcome challenges and hurdles people are to face during their lives. Thus, when hardships come, the strength for standing by each other isn’t there, so people leave one another.
3. Foreign Interference
Among many marriages, the interruption of parents, friends, or even siblings causes a considerable lack of agreements between the spouses. If there is a constant foreign poke between two people, they will both get frustrated, and there will be hundreds of misunderstandings. Nobody wants anybody meddling into their affairs, so if you want a marriage to survive, you need to ensure you don’t let anybody pry into your private life.
Emotional and physical abuse is a sad reality for some couples who go through a divorce. An abuser isn’t always a wrong person, but instead, it’s his emotional difficulties and childhood traumas that turn him into something he isn’t. Domestic violence is another form of abuse that may lead to problems in the relationship. But one thing that is worth mentioning here is that not all people are suffering from domestic violence file against the abuser.
Their sole intention is to make the marriage work no matter what. However, in the last few years, both genders have realized their rights in marriage and now openly speak against staying in abusive marriages.
1. Extramarital Affairs
Nobody wants a cheating spouse, right? According to our research, the most common reason for failed marriages was infidelity. Extramarital affairs not only cause mayhem in a marriage, but it also indicates that one person has felt the need to turn to another person. This reason is by far the most common reason we came across. Even though we don’t know what causes someone to cheat in a relations ship, and that is also something one cannot understand in a single interview.
However, the two most common reasons for cheating were resentment and anger. Another common reason that many people suggested was the lack of emotional intimacy that made them turn to another person.
Most of the time, infidelity begins as an emotional affair, which later turns into something thoroughly else.
What do you think?
As you can see, failed marriages don’t just happen overnight. It takes time, a lack of understanding, no connection, and a thousand other reasons to make a spouse realize why he doesn’t want to live with the other anymore. A single reason doesn’t cause it. But if there is trust, love, and communication between two married people, they can easily overcome all the other hurdles. Comment below your thoughts about this.